Everybody Loves a Monkey

Last night Babe ordered pizza. This place has pretty good pizza, but doesn't deliver. Every time I pick up from here, the conversation goes like this:

Pizza Boy: Can I help you?
Me: Yes, I'm here to pick up a pizza. Name is Trudi.
PB: Okay, let me go see if it's ready.
Me: {waiting patiently}
PB: {comes back after 2 minutes} Could it be under a different name? What was your order?
Me: Pep pizza with mushrooms and japs, no, it'll be under Trudi.
PB: {finds pizza} Okay, here you go.

Last night, Babe ordered the pizza. I heard him tell the guy on the phone 5 times, No, it's TRUDI. T.R.U.D.I. Okay, thanks.

I show up, walk in and think, shoudl I tell them what I had, to avoid him coming out asking me the inevitable? Naaaa, no way it could happen the last 6 times in a row.

PB: Is there any way it could be under another name?
Me: {thinking to myself, are you fucking stoned? seriously?} No, it's Trudi
Other PB: Heyyyy, it's under Brudy.
Me: {Thinking, who the fuck thinks "Brudy" is a name?}
PB comes back with a small. 9" for me and Babe.
Me: Uh, I believe that's supposed to be a medium.
PB: Oh... we don't have medium.
Me: Uh... that probably would have been good to know when we ordered it, no?
Manager lady steps in, equally as stoned: Ohhhh... uh, did you want me to make you a large? It'll only take 7 minutes... and then... if you want... you can take both of them, but only pay for the small one?
Me: Hmm.. okay. I'll wait here.
ML: Alright... uh, you want to wait in the (smokey)bar?
Me: {are you serious? I'm almost 8 months pregnant, dummas} No thank you, I'm fine here.

10 minutes later, she walks out and says, Your pizza is coming out of the oven right now... That'll be $19.
Me: {looking at her like a confused puppy}
Her: Ohhhh... did you want to pay for the just the small pizza and take the large? Or do you want to pay for the large and take both of them?
Me: {No dummas... I want to pay for BOTH of them} Well, I don't NEED both of them.
Her: Okay.. so... then it's going to be $15.

She comes out with both pizza's.. did you want to take both pizza's..... or did you just want the small one?
Me: {I've given up} I'd like the large one, thank you. And since you're offering... I"ll take them both, thank you very much.

Take my damn pizza and walk out.

How in the hell do they stay in business? And the pizza was soggy! I had to pop it in my oven for another 10 minutes...gag.