Everybody Loves a Monkey

Okay, so I figure I would wear a skirt to work today. I know, crazy right? Well I'll have you know that I look super cute with my plaid gray, black, white skirt, pink tank top, black sweater, my pokeys hangin out with stiletto heels. Feel like I have the raunchy, schoolgirl look goin on today, which I'm sure will be much appreciated when people start showing up to work.

Anyway, I had to go to VS to get some thigh highs (yes, sluttin it up baby) and on my way out of the mall , on a day that I feel particularly extra frumpy, some dude is jogging out of the mall behind me, to my car. I thought I saw him in the corner of my eye, but didn't think anything of it. I get in my car, close the door and start digging for my cell phone and BAM! there he is standing at my door. Now, for some reason, I had my hands in the air, my ring right there in his face, and he motions something about my hand, Kind of like Oh, right, okay then uh.. yeah.. alright... and starts walking away. I look at him like he's a lunatic and do what every woman should do in that situation, I roll my window down, (Dumass) he's like "Oh, I uh... you're not single are you? I see you have a ring on." I said, Nope...sorry, very married... and he shyly slithered away, smiling, humiliated, tail between his legs... And of course, I had already hit the talk button on my cell, which was calling Babe. My uconnect picked up on my jeep and it goes right through my navigation system and is all speaker phoned... so I start talking to Babe, and this dude thinks I"m talking to HIM!! Ahhhhh!! Get away dude... so I throw the car in reverse and get the flock outta there.

And then this am, leaving starbucks, I stopped THREE cars in the parking lot, going different directions at the same time, all of them waiting for me to step off the curb and walk across the street. It's ALL because of my legs and heels. It's amazing the attention I get. It really is. So what did I do? I opened up my sunglasses, slid them on my nose and looked at all three, and walked across the street... :) I'm so cool. (Yeah right, did I mention the legs part?)

This just leads me to wonder, what COULDN'T I get away with today? I may have to play with this one. It's funny because I know not all guys are leg guys but the second I pull these guys out, dudes turn into retards. And not in the normal mental handicapped way, as in the drool on myself, forget my name, where I"m going, what I'm doing, but I gotta take a look at those pokies as much as I can, kinda way. Quite funny. I guess I should enjoy it. It sure as hell isn't going to last forever! LOL